T'sara Vandercross (tsara) wrote,
T'sara Vandercross
tsara

Todays Idiot Call of the Day

So, some lady calls in...we will call her Ann (Not her real name...but it works)...and first off tells me that she has been working with the ISP version of our company (going to start omitting that information...companies names and such for where I work for non-disclosure reasons) and the just can't get her internet turned on. I think, "Ok, no big dea, our ISP has yet once again passed the buck to us to deal with people."

So, I ask her what exactly is the issue she's facing. So, this crazy lady start talking at 100 words every 2 seconds....or at least close to it.

I managed to catch something about Yahoo, and little Butterly, and Messenger having an X on the faces....And Netscape...and more messenger stuff...and more butterfly...and Windows broken...

My manager IM's me...
"Wow..."
Me: "Jesus Christ"
Him: "Good luck on this call....I'm coaching you."

So now I'm thinking...great...this is SO going to suck. Meanwhile, this lady is still talking like mad. I've missed some of the conversation she has been having with herself...for clearly she's the only one that can keep up with her.

So, I interupt her.

"Ann. You have got to slow down if I am to be able to help you."

She FINALLY takes a breath...(How do people DO that???) then says "Ok."

So, I start trying to restate the issue she's having....sorting out all the CRAP she has said and getting to the real issue. Which is thus....her DSL doesn't work.

Now, I'm guessing the ISP just didn't want to deal with this lady and wanted to get her off their phones. So, who do you pass it to? ME! Alright, I'm paid to deal with this...so, I start telling her about the fact of what is wrong with her computer and that she has to go back and continue working with our ISP. To which, she starts going off AGAIN at 100 words every 2 seconds about MORE issues her computer is having....all havign to do with not having DSL active.

Again..."Ann, you have to slow down for me to be able to help you." She stops...again. (Didn't notice a breath this time...scary.)

I finally tell her that she HAS to call the ISP because there is NOTHING at all I can do for her. Even for messenger. She has to send an e-mail to get support for messenger, and she can't do that until she has her DSL fixed.

She then says, "Oh. Ok." And hangs up.

I got a 4.0 on that coaching score. (We are ranked on a 5 point scale where 3.0 is doing your job. 4.0 means a fantastic job. 5.0 is ungodly. (I've only gotten 1 5.0 my entire time I've ever worked here, and rarely hear of others.))

So now tell me....do I just attract lunatics to my phone? Do I give off some weird phone vibe that says "Morons! Idiots! Freaks of Nature! Give me your calls!"? Yeash.
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